


i know i should be sick of you calling

by orphan_account



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: M/M, Pokemon AU, ryan is a pokemon breeder, shane is a team rocket grunt, theyre soft thats it thats the story
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-14
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2019-02-14 22:20:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13017339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Shane is a Team Rocket grunt who's tired, just wants to get paid, not really evil at all, and sort of soft for that Pokemon breeder that lives on the ranch just off Route 25.





	1. Chapter 1

When Shane was a little boy, he had wanted to be a Pokemon coordinator. The flashy competitions, the working alongside your Pokemon partners to put on a great show, the dressing up to look your absolute best... It had thrilled him to no end. His parents would often catch him watching the television all through the day, forever tuned into the contest channel until one of them ushered him out to go play outside with the neighborhood children. The life of fame and beauty had entrapped him.

Nowadays, though, Shane just wanted to get paid.

Team Rocket was never his first choice, but it was never anybody's first choice, aside from Giovanni's entourage of wives and other paramours to keep him company. But everybody needed money to support themselves, their family, and Team Rocket paid well for just some dirty work. While it was a risky job, and the grunts like him were rather disposable, money was money and Shane needed to eat just like everybody else. 

Over the years, it had stopped mattering to him that he was just a face in a sea of grunts, it had stopped mattering to him that he wore the same clothing every single day, it had stopped mattering to him that the way of Rocket Living was pretty shit. He still managed to eat better food then the slop in the mess hall of his station, saving money from his paycheck so he could eat more then grits and other miscellaneous goop and chunks. And he was one of the few grunts of his station that were able to go outside daily.

Shane tugged on his black hat with the 'R' emblazoned on it in bright red, his Houndoom huffing. Oh, Houndoom. His first Pokemon had been a Houndour he had found a ways away from this station, the station he had been assigned to when he was just a rookie. Where had that station been again? He couldn't remember. The years had sort of blended together, and it wasn't like he really cared.

Besides, this station he could see Ryan.

The Ryan in question was outside as he always was when Shane approached. He was always swarmed with those baby Pokemon, wasn't he? He could see the appeal, maybe. They were sort of cute, but Shane had Houndoom, and that was the only partner he really needed. Partner in the Pokemon sense, obviously. It wasn't that Shane spent every hour of his off time thinking about how if he wasn't a Rocket grunt, he could just go up to the young man who tended to baby Pokemon and ask him out and—

And nothing. Shane, in all of his years of being a grunt, had never let himself get close to any potential lover. What was the point? Sure, nobody around the organization really gave a fuck if you were smooching on somebody as long as you were doing your work, but it wasn't like many of them did. Nobody liked them. They were the outcasts. They did the dirty work, they got paid, they survived.

So even if Shane might go back to his station with daydreams and red cheeks, it didn't matter.


	2. Chapter 2

Of course, Shane knew that one day Ryan would approach him. He figured anybody would question why they were being stared at by a guy who wasn’t exactly hiding his criminal status after a while of it happening. He wasn’t going to lie to himself and claim that he had been particularly subtle about his admiring gazes, but he had kept his distance, and that was fine, wasn’t it?

However, Shane hadn’t exactly wanted their first official meeting to go quite like this. He had wanted to do something maybe a bit, he didn’t know, heroic? Like save him from a rainstorm or something. And Ryan would grasp his arms and look up at him with those big eyes and thank him and they’d make sweet love all night and get married. Something along those lines.

Instead, the Pokemon breeder currently had him knocked down onto his ass in the mud, a boot on his chest and his damn Lycanroc snarling and snapping it’s jaws at Houndoom. Shane was almost breathless over how nice if it weren’t for his overriding annoyance over how his plan had been spoiled. Not his plan to sweep Ryan off of his feet, mind you.

No. Shane needed to get paid, and he was well aware that if he stole some kid’s fucking rare ass Sableye he would certainly get a raise. Seriously, how well off was that kid’s parents that he got that thing? It was beyond him. Of course, Ryan had caught him in the act, and now that kid and his Sableye was long gone and did he mention he really needed that paycheck? 

“Will you call your mutt off of Houndoom?” Shane spat where he lay on the ground under Ryan’s foot. The Lycanroc was Midday form, and while Midnight form looked scarier and were more aggressive, Middays were usually stronger. Ryan gave a huff above him before calling for his Lycanroc to back down, but he ground his boot further into his chest.

“You tried to take that kid’s Sableye,” The breeder accused, fire behind his words. His usually warm chocolate eyes had hardened, and Shane found himself gulping. For somebody who was usually soft and covered head to toe in baby Pokemon, this guy was intimidating. Was it kind of hot? Yes. Did Shane particularly want to be laying in the mud, though? No, not really. “You’re lucky I don’t report you to the police!”

Shane rolled his hazel eyes before gripping Ryan’s ankle in his two hands, jerking it off of him, causing the other man to stumble a bit backwards while he stood up. Shit, now his uniform was all soaked in mud. Wonderful. He sneered, adjusting the cap on his head and starting to stalk off. He almost expected Ryan to come running after him, but he couldn’t be too surprised he hadn’t been followed. After all, it wasn’t like he had actually gotten the kid’s Pokemon.

And as he lay in his too small bunk in his station, if he replayed being pinned under Ryan over and over, that was just between him and his mind.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im not happy with this but whatever  
> i wrote it entirely on mobile during classes be proud of me


	3. Chapter 3

Shane was getting sloppy. He knew that for a fact, and he hated himself for it. Having once been one of the pros at stealing Pokemon and doing any other task thrown his way, whether it be causing havoc in town or stealing more rations, he was now not as successful at anything. Chores such as cleaning his station or taking out the garbage were still easy and routine, but his higher ups seemed to be getting more and more frustrated with his lack of bringing in the gold, so to speak.

_Maybe if your head wasn't full of you down on the ground you wouldn't be in this mess,_  his mind supplied as he propped up his foot against the wall of the cell he was in. Oh, yeah, the cell. Jail. He had never been in this position before, though he knew a few in his station that had. The question was, would he be bailed out? He wasn't exactly close to any of his, er, co-workers, and he wasn't exactly a high position, now was he?

Maybe it had been a mistake to do something as risky as trying to steal from the local Pokemart right when Officer Jenny was around. Fine, he could admit that. However, he had needed something to prove to his executives that he was worth keeping around, and not to be relocated. Lord knew that relocation would be away from Ryan, and sometimes that didn't seem so bad— Wouldn't it help him get over this awful crush? But also, he was a man of many needs, and one of them was to peer at the cute breeder from across the street, damn it.

Speaking of peering at cute breeders, it really, truly, was not helpful that the guy was now at the station, looking over at him as if they needed proof from a witness of other crimes. He was wearing a Team Rocket uniform. What did they think he was, some sort of first offender? A rookie in this whole shindig? He was a petty thief, sure, but he knew what he was doing. Everybody knew that. Team Rocket was only recently being cracked down on for a reason, and that reason being they used to be way harder to catch.

Ryan stood on the other side of the bars, sneering down at him with a smile that could only be seen as smug. Shane sneered back, but more in a sort of disgusted way, as if he could ever be disgusted with him. Maybe not disgust, but he certainly was kind of pissy. Was that taking the edge off his little crush? No. If anything, it was just a reminder that his type in men were soft-on-the-exterior, son-of-a-bitch interior. Ugh. Maybe he was disgusted, but only by himself.

"Happy Holidays, Madej," The breeder drawled out in that stupid, kind of sexy smug voice, leaning forward so his face was close to the bars separating the two of them. Shane tapped his fingers rhythmically against the platform he lay on, rolling his hazel eyes. God, this guy was insufferable. He sort of loved it. "Maybe a Christmas miracle will happen, and one of your members will bail you out early?"

Shane sneered and flushed a bit. "They'll come for me." He spat out, sitting up a bit as if to challenge Ryan, though he wouldn't. He couldn't, anyways, because he knew there was a good chance nobody would be bailing him out. Merry fucking Christmas indeed, huh? As if any of his team would actually show their face around here and risk getting themselves in trouble.

He lay back, staring up at the ceiling. Maybe they'd let him have a Christmas tree in prison. That'd be cool.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> merry christmas (im a day early but whatever) to those who celebrate and i hope the ppl who dont have a good week

**Author's Note:**

> come talk to me on my tumblr @drunkshane im mostly just sad but i love talking abt headcanons and sometimes i take drabble requests


End file.
